strangeness

It’s a strange feeling – pretty alien to me – that my house is now, finally, company ready.  Like, I don’t have to panic if someone rings my bell.  Seriously – it’s strange.

and nice.

No idea if I can keep it like this, but I guess if I want to continue my life with my family as it is, I have to.  Of course, it’s worth it… but can my depression allow me to see past the mess when they make a mess?  Can I make myself SEE that it can be cleaned up again? Or will old habits fall back into place? 

I’m thinking of posting a a series of pictures each week to prove my house is clean.

Then again, since I can’t really be relied upon to do anything with certainty, I don’t know that that would work either.

I *do* know that if I let things go back to the way they were, he’ll leave me – us – and we’ll be in trouble.

Today’s accomplishments:

• weighed in w/wii
• swept and washed the kitchen floor
• cleaned my bathroom from top to bottom, washed the floor
• lunch is next.